


Collide

by Delicate_Doll



Category: Hiveswap
Genre: Blood and Injury, Car Accidents, Just Kids Being Kids Here Folks, M/M, Siblings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-25
Updated: 2019-04-25
Packaged: 2020-01-31 18:09:21
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,862
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18596680
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Delicate_Doll/pseuds/Delicate_Doll
Summary: Tirona needs to relax a little, and what's best for relaxing? Definitely not watching your pseudo-sibling get hit by a car, but it ends up being pretty fun anyway.





	Collide

"- No, really Tirona it's perfectly safe. While I hesitate to call it a science exactly...Mh. It's a..scientific art, there, you just have to be careful. I did it all the time when I was your age, and as you can see-" he gestures to himself "I'm perfectly fine. If that's not enough for you, consider the reward. 30% isn't a bad compensation for face work as I'm sure you know."

Your name is Tirona Kasund, and right now you're standing on the side of the road with the one and only Tagora Gorjek, as he tries to talk you into walking into traffic. So far... he's not doing a bad job. If you hadn't already decided to make him demonstrate first, you'd already be in front of a scuttlebuggy. You cross your arms, tilting your head away.

"It sure sounds like you're trying to get rid of me Gor-gor, do I need to remind you what would get sent out should I fail to input my password every day at 7?" You've had an ace up your sleeve on him for the better part of the past perigree, and you love letting it peak out whenever you can. He certainly doesn't- and huffs at you, hand light on his chest and blood bright in his cheeks.

"I'm insulted you think so little of me Teeny T, really. One must have a  _little_ trust here and there, and this should be seen as a moneymaking venture- not an assassination attempt."

"I thought you said this was a way to relax before my case on-"

"Making money  _is_ an extremely relaxing activity, and things tend to be more fun when you quit whining. Just for the record." He goes back to surveying the road, hands on his hips.

"...Y'know. I would probably feel better if I was able to see a professional do this first. Show me how it's done and all."

He looks back down at you, raising an eyebrow in consideration. "... I've explained the support role to you? It doesn't work without tears, can you manage that?"

"You think I can't get tears? Gor-gor now  _I'm_ insulted. I've got this." He hems and haws for a little while longer, but sighs, giving in.

"Fine." He waits till the road is clear before he quickly scoots across to the other side, taking out his palmhusk. Not long after, yours buzzes with a message from him.

" **At least look busy, you're making us obvious. It could be a while before a good one comes by.** "

You pace around, walking up and down the sidewalk. When five minutes turns to ten you pull out your palmhusk too, editing your latest work. Chitters not gonna know what to with itself when you drop this bad boy, it works on every level. Every. Single. Level.

"Tirona!" You jerk your head away to find Tagora waving to you, smiling big and bright (way too peppy to really be him), and you quickly pocket your palmhusk and wave to him too. Oh, right, you get back in position on the sidewalk. He checks the street, left, right, left again, and walks straight into the path of a scuttlebuggy.

He screams, you scream, he rolls across the pavement, and you hightail it to him.

The buggy for some reason actually stopped, the driver wide-eyed and startled behind the glass, but you're super not looking at him, all eyes on Tagora. He's sprawled out in the road, hair strewn over his face and limbs akimbo, trembling all over. You're actually sort of losing it, is he bleeding?! What looks like blood is coming out of his mouth that means internal damage right oh holy shit- your freakout is cut short by the opening of his eye, calm and slow.

"Are you covering my face?" he mumbles, mouth hardly moving.

"What?! Tagora are you okay that was super-"

"Can he see my face T, it's okay"

"I- you- I'm blocking you I think- Tagora are you actually-"

Once he gets confirmation the driver can't see his head his face takes a complete 180, going from pained to relaxed (if a little concerned) in under a second, speaking quickly but soothingly.

"We went over this, it doesn't actually hurt if you know how to do it."

"Sounded like it hurt! Tagora the sound it made when you- and - and the blood what's up with the-" He shushed you, sticking out his tongue a little to show you a fake blood capsule, one side popped.

"I'm a professional, now-" You both hear the driver door open, and Tagora cries out, long and loud, and when he continues it's back to barely there, quiet and rushed. "-We'll go for ice cream later I'm sorry, tears, people love tears! Don't forget to play to your age too, have fun with this I-" His head drops back onto the pavement, spitting up more of the fake blood.

You look up to find an indigo looking down at the two of you in horror, standing about a foot back. You look at him, then down at Tagora. Then back to him. Then down to Tagora, and make a choice.

"You hit him! Oh god oh god he's- you- _you hit him_!" you wail.

The blueblood startles, ever so slightly creeping closer. "Is he... Is he going to be okay?" he asks, tentative.

" _I'm five_! I don't know! Gor-gor- I- oh god why?! Can you hear me? Are you okay? C'mon that 3 o'clock case is waiting- that's- that's really important you've gotta get up, please! I can't lose you! This can't be happening- not like this!" You have to hold your breath for a second, but you get the waterworks up and running about halfway through, streaming down your cheeks. Gor-gors had them running since the door opened, trailing softly into his hairline while he twitches.

"He's a legislacerator..?" the kid asks you, a spike of nerves showing through.

"One of the best! I am too, but I never thought I'd have to take someone in for- for this- I- " you break into a sob, putting your face in your hands but have to quickly come back up or risk busting out laughing. This IS fun. "I- that's right what was your name, mister! I'm taking you in this is- oh god this is a travesty! If you weren't being so reckless my  _best friend_ might not be- be-" Tagora hacks up more blood, chest heaving and straining. It's still a little freaky how real it looks, so you look back up to the highblood as he inches closer still, batting your tear heavy lashes.

"I- sweetheart I don't think- um-  _that's_  necessary I mean- he looks f-" He nudges Tagoras chest with his foot and Gor-gor lets out another wail, making the guy jump back. "It was an accident! Maybe I could- I- this can't go to court-"

You stand, rounding on him and pointing "He was my  _best friend_ you think I'm just going to let this  _slide_ you-" He hastily digs out his wallet, pressing several bills to your accusational hand. 400. Not bad, but... "My _best_. Friend." Another hundred. Better. You turn away, lowering your voice to a mournful and bitter mumble. "... Just go."

He quickly does so, taking one last look at the two of you before all but running back to his scuttlebuggy, then reversing all the way back down the lazy street.

"....is he gone?"

"Mhm! We did it!"

Tagora sits up, laughing and wiping up the teal from his chin. He's still has a healthy bit all over his face (kid commits to hacking) but you'll tell him later. Maybe "Our total?"

"500!"

"Well done Tirona! A little dramatic in the middle there, but very impressive." He stands, whipping out a travel hairbrush from who knows where and starts fixing his hair as he herds you out of the street and down the sidewalk. "If you want to go again we'll need to wait a few weeks, but really I think we'd need to practice more- considering your reaction to just witnessing it..." You hand him the money, and he hands you back 200.

"It was scary you jerk... and 200 is  _not_ 30% of 500."

"Exactly, it _is_ scary, because it  _is_ dangerous. It was stupid to think you could play the body on your first try, it was a bad call on my part. I'm. I'll try to be more mindful in the future to avoid another incident of that sort " He's using his courtroom voice on you, formal and loud, but breaks character to murmur "And I know you pest, it's called being nice."

You laugh a little, bumping his arm with yours. "You're not nice."

"Brat."

"Sleaze."

"Ah-ah, you've now participated in something objectively sleazy with me you're not allowed to use that one anymore Teeny T."

"How'd you not get hurt? I saw you actually hit the car Gor-gor."

"It was going... maybe 30 T, it's 40 and up you have to watch for."

"Then what was that noise?"

He shrugs, smoothing out his bangs. "Elbow on the curve of the hood. Makes a loud noise and the driver can feel it. I told you, it's an art."

You think on it for a while more as the two of you walk back to the courthouse. "... how'd you know they'd stop though? You deal with collide and scampers all the time."

He makes a funny sort of face, glancing to the side and scrunching his nose, but after a second flips his hair a little and replies "That part's the science. All self-driving scuttlebuggies produced after it was officially decided a few sweeps back that collide and scampers were, in fact, a misdemeanor have an automatic break when you hit something and are moving at a speed greater than 25 mph. It's about recognizing the cars, speeds, and what you personally can handle, but the real trick is knowing what kind of driver will get out." You've hit the courthouse steps, and Tagora stalls at the bottom, nonchalantly adding "I have a date." when you open your mouth to question him.

"...Alright, I'll bite. What kind of person gets out of the-"

"Gor-Gor!"

You both look towards the interruption, a little irked, but he smiles a second later, waving to the guy now approaching the two of you. Oh. Oh shit. You go teal in the face, having only seen this guy in certain raunchy selfies you swiped off Tagoras computer. Tagora doesn't seem to be thinking about your ace in the hole at least, snagging the blue guy's tie and pulling him over to you.

"Galekh sweetheart, meet my co-worker, Tirona."

The blue guy (Galekh) holds out a hand to you, and you nervously shake it. He smiles softly, and speaks softer, like he's worried you'll make a break for it if he spooks you. "It's a pleasure, Tirona. I've heard a lot about you."

"Tirona, meet the type of driver you need to look for." Galekh looks down at him quizzically, then back to you, wide-eyed as you bust out laughing.

**Author's Note:**

> Remember when the troll call cards were still coming out and we all saw Tagora and Tironas matching little uniforms and said "Siblings! They're awful siblings and do awful sibling things together." Because I do. I think about that time a lot.


End file.
